tonight i start my journey.

it took me a long time to realize this. what i have to do. what i have been seeking. tonight i finally realize it. meaning. this is what i have been looking for all these time. touch people's lives. this is what i've always wanted to do. to find recognition and acknowledgement in others by being a part of their lives. nothing could be more noble, and yes even selfish, than wanting to be part of someone else's life.

i've sought this in an earth-based belief system and it has led me, and continuous to lead me, into widsom i could have only imagined possible in books, movies and songs. i am still learning. part of this learning is the realization of what i truly want and seek. my belief system reinforces my life purpose, or passion if you will.

emptiness - the state of being empty. void - an absence of everything except space. and if there is space, there is room for filling. there are a lot of stuff competing for that space. each trying to occupy the most volume. each is necessary for growth, my growth. i seek to fill that space, not with trivialities or mundane matters, but with elements worth saving. each is a treasure worth keeping for a time. and when the moment comes to let go of these precious stuff, i pray for the strength to do so. i am human, after all. frail. yet strong if i decide to.

so i go on this journey. i have all i need to start. what is essential later on will be picked up along the way. one step at a time. what is important is that i make the first step.

tonight i start my journey.